i want
to write

i feel
so plain

so empty
so useless

i want
words

but
i hate them

because
i don’t want

to rely
on them

to feel
myself

again

i should
be

just as
i am

regardless
of what

i do
and don’t do

i should
feel free

and worthy
and important
and creative
and alive
and beautiful
and genius

innately
within